No Boo?.. No Bestie?.. Not Feeling This Look. =0[

Okay so I've been back from Cali for a while now. Just been in a really sucky 'rut' and didn't feel like blogging. To be honest.. I don't really feel like blogging now but I do feel like expressing my emotions. So get ready for this roller coaster..

So in California, I must say I enjoyed myself but I didn't really get the opportunity to express my adventurous wiles. I was pretty much couped up in the hotel room most of my trip. Which, I guess it was to be expected since I was travelling with family. But it was basically..... basically, a big "I guess" moment. IDK.. I know I have to go back and re-do things at the next given opportunity.

Okay so anyway. When I got back home I had to go to work. And I have this whole love/hate relationship with my job. I love the pay (somewhat). But the experience there could definitely be upgraded. It's part-time so I'm not really complaining. It's not a permanent move for me but I definitely have my share of "Wooo-sahhh!" moments there. Customers really try to test the waters with me and my temperament. LOL.

Man, I don't know if I'm inheriting the bi-polar tendencies of my mother or my PMS is going mainstream but I've been going through the motions.

You guys wanna know what I've been 'craving' for at least 2 months now? A man. LOL. I want to get "Boo'd UP" like my girl Tracie Mae was talking about. Everybody has them. Relationships have become the new prada bag. Seriously, everyone I know is getting with S O M E B O D Y. A plague is infecting my area. It's not necessarily like I'm one of those lame, desperate females who must remain at a certain pathetic level of dependency. But it's more like it's been too long.. and I want somebody there to share my experiences with. Someone older.. wiser.. a guide, if you will, during this 'trying' time in life. It would be nice. Especially since I'm going through some changes and I think others in my life are too.

Like if you look back to my first posts on here I talked about my bestfriend (yes, I realize that's two words.. don't try me)William. Well, I haven't talked to Apple Juice (his nickname) in several weeks. And it's not for lack of trying. Last few times I talked to him he seemed so very agitated. And I'm not trying to make it like the world revolves around my existence but the root of annoyance had my name somewhere on it. I mean, I guess it shouldn't matter because we're best friends but as the same time I'm really tired of emotionally draining myself to keep lines of communication open. I do it with everyone. And it's extremely tiring. I can't do it. Really, I can't so I had to stop for a while. My theory is if someone wants to talk to me they know how to get in touch with me. End of story.

Man, I swear I'm going through some tough hard-knocks in life. But like I always say that MUST be a sign that a blessing is about to come. Something big, too. God's working on me so that I can receive a gift and the way He's working I just know I'm going to be literally "crunk for Jesus" and I ain't even mad at that.

Well anyway, feel free to comment. Do whatever at this point. If this is your first time reading I apologize but go back and read other posts, I promise those are a bit more intellectual. LOL. Keep checking back in, please. And tell your friends about it. THANKS!


1Luv,
Jai.Love-

California Love...

Okay so as I type I'm sitting in my cousin's dorm room in Palo Alto, California. And I L-O-V-E Cali so far.

I don't have much to say but I'll report back later...

Random Rant #1

Have you ever been so determined to do something and then when it comes down to crunch time you just sit by idly? Well, that's how I feel right about now. And it's not even anything too serious. I'm supposed to leave for California tomorrow morning and I can't even motivate my lazy butt to go finish washing my clothes. Gah... slothfulness is surely not the business.


Ok, so yesterday I went to work. And boy, I tell you your girl Jai must be losing her marbles because this white boys are beginning to become so attractive to me. And not to say that white men can't be attractive but I've ALWAYS had a personal preference for my black men. Shoot, to be completely honest, my preference has been for dark chocolate black men. It's nothing like a Kevin Garnett complexioned brother to walk in and I faint from unbelief. Lol. But anyway there's this guy I work with and he's cute --for a white boy. Lol. Yeah, sorry. I can't do it to my black brothers.

Yesterday I took my tacky butt to Target. I swear they try to do you so grimy. I seriously don't know why I didn't go to WalMart. Target is only the business when it comes to cheap clothes. But they sure are expensive on the little items. Man, that burned my butt. I spent almost $12 on 2 pairs of flip flops and some Ambi product. I don't know about yall our there but that's a big glutton and high for me. Especially because I'm broke.

And another thing. MoFo's always wanna ask you to promote and spread the word about them and when you ask them to return the favor they become a big hollywood Halle Berry Lawrence-wanna-change-his-name-to-Larry Fishburn superstar. I guess one thing is true --black folk will remain black folk.

Ok, now lemme stop. That was so politically incorrect of me.

But it is so true. Well I'm tired again.. the laziness is creeping back on me so I'm going to cut this short.